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View Full Version : Getting Depressed By The State of Families......by me...



Heimdhal
17th January 2012, 06:12 PM
For some reason, my wife and I seem to be the magnet of orphan children. Ok, maybe not exactly Oliver twist orphans, but a magnet none the less. Heres the most recent

I had this kid today just shoot an arrow through my heart. Theres this chubby little 10 year old that just moved into the neighborhood over the summer. Within the first few days he was riding his bike around with other kids in the community and knocked his chain loose. My daughter was playing with all of them, though shes much younger, so the kid looks up at me with puppy dog eyes like "can you fix this?".

Of course I say yes and promptly reset his chain and hes back in business.

"wow" he says "I cant believe you know how to do that". I just chuckle.

Ever since that day hes like my little shadow when he sees me out working. I dont mind.

Anyways, today he came to me and said "hey, my chain is off again" So Im thinking, ok, no biggie. He brings me the chain; its busted in half. Im thinking "ok, whats a little extra work" so I stop holster production and get to the chian. Then he brings the bike over. Its a new 21 speed mountain bike. Starting to get a little above my pay grade, I havent rechained a mountain bike in 10 years.

I work on it for like 20 minutes, of course I have no chain repair tools since I dont have a bike anymore so Im literaly making tools in my garage. The kid is in absolute awe. He'd never seen a man work in a garage before. He says to me:

"My dad would never be able to do this, you're awesome". It makes me happy, but Im about 5 minutes from telling the kid hes outta luck with me, I've done all I can reasonably do. Hes missing the rivet, a few links are mangled up, the whole nine yards. The he tells me "If my mom find outs I broke my new bike shell kill me, i just got the bike for christmas."

Ok, fine, I'll spend 10 more minutes instead and then go talk to the parents to tell 'em it wasnt the kids fault, yadda yadda. I had to get back to work, as my customers will tell you I am stupid behind on orders right now and I finaly had time JUST for leather work, and it was ticking away quick.

I say to him "Hey, Im sure your step dad can probably do this" trying to ease him down a bit, thinking they need to just go get a new chain and have it put on. (He had mentioned before it was his step dad.)

He tells me "no, he doesnt know how to use any tools, he doesnt even have any".

I say "What about your dad?" Asking only out of curiosity and general nosey-ness

Then he takes the Dagger of Saddness out of the Sheath of Lonliness and plunges it deep into the ventricals of my heart, and twists it around.

"My dad went to jail cause of domestic violence on me and my mom and sister and stuff and I had to be a witness and junk." He says, with the puppy dog eyes looking at the ground, getting a little wet.




Long story short: Two hours, 50 tons of grease and dirt, home forged tools and a million knuckle scrapes later I had that bike rechained for the Tour De France, the brakes tightened, the wheels balanced, the shifters lubed, tires infalted and one happy 10 year old.


What is depressing me is this is about the 4th broken family in the last two years where my wife and I basicaly became mommy and daddy until they moved away. The last was a usless single mother of 5, whos children we basicaly took and fed 2 meals a day, darn near every day because despite being on section 8, food stamps, disability and welfare, the mother couldnt be bothered to whip up some chicken once in a while. The, oldest, a 13 year old boy was abusing his younger sisters and even the mother was terrified of him (he was 13 and I kd you not he was 6-2, 250 lbs. He towered over ME) but I set his ass straight and he fell in line.

The 10 year old daughter couldnt read because she never went to school, so of course my wife and I sat down with her 4 nights a week and taught her to read and do math, and Im talking 2nd grade level reading, when she was in 5th. This is of course after working on our own daughter speech therapy.

Theres been others, but Im starting to get depressed by all this. Its disgusting whats happening to families in this country. And mind you, I live in a good neighborhood of moderatley well off upper-milddle class folk, not the ghetto.

Ughhhhhhhhhh :banghead:

General of Darkness
17th January 2012, 06:23 PM
For being a prick you're a good man. ;D

I'm not sure when but I think some time around the fabrication of the "sexual revolution" the family construct has been slowly but surely been destroyed.

Don't worry the state will raise your kids and entitlement b.s. is the all the rage these days. The feminist movement, and on and on and on. Don't get me wrong men have as much responsibility in this. Dunno if this mentality can be fixed, especially with jews promoting Desperate House Wives etc.

BTW - All those kids you helped will never forget you.

Ares
17th January 2012, 06:32 PM
Heimdhal,

I commend you for doing the right thing. It's honorable as well as respectable and a trait that like you said is lost on a lot of people anymore.

I've noticed it too, the family unit has been completely destroyed, parents take the route of "It's easier to be a friend than a parent" to their child.

Old Herb Lady
17th January 2012, 06:37 PM
I know it is very very sad. God Bless You !!!! Just keep on helpin' them. We get one or two a week anymore. Used to be every couple of months.

The other morning in the freezing cold, wind blowing, couple inches snow on the ground, probably 19 or 20 degrees there was a 6 year old walking down the road (probably a quarter mile) to the bus stop.

I stopped my car & said jump in !! Took my gloves off & made him put them on and I said , What are you doing out here by yourself ??
( I've picked him up dozens & dozens of times before but not in this frigid weather )

Anyways he was crying his face was red and frozen like a popsicle. I wanted to march up to his mother's house & smack her ! (nice house too)

So he proceeds to tell me in his gasping breath that there was an argument at the house (that early in the morning?) and his mom couldn't get the 2 year old baby ready in time so he had to just leave by himself. There's no dad cuz he went away to drug rehab & then moved somewhere else.

What a mess.

Another time, same kid, comes to my door screaming & crying that he was upstairs in his room playing & came downstairs & everyone was gone & he was home alone & terrified !!!! I said come on in !!
NO COAT NO GLOVES nothing just the clothes on his back & he came running down here to me.

About half hour later I hear a man screaming running up & down the street trying to find his son.
The Dad had apparently left the house to perform a quickie drug deal somewhere.
(this was before he went to rehab & moved away) He comes back home & finds his kid missing.
I went outside & yelled , He's in here !!!!!

This world is so messed up.

I am not making this stuff up, I swear to God. Another time I had a five year old walk into my house & start playing with some toys. My door was unlocked & it was summertime. Me & my daughter were in another part of the house and we found him & almost screamed our heads off !
I said who are you and where did you come from ?????????? I HAD NEVER SEEN HIM IN MY LIFE !!!!!!!!! YIKES !!!!!

Here his sister who is a teenager was responsible for babysitting him & fell asleep so he went on a nice long walk & ended up here & saw toys, cars outside & followed the toy trail & made himself at home !!!!

I'm like I gotta call the cops, I gotta call the cops !!!! Instead I started calling up anybody in the neighborhood that I could get a hold of and after describing him a lady knew where he belonged & the half-asleep sister came to get him & never even said a Thank You !

I could go on & on & on.

JDRock
17th January 2012, 06:41 PM
im..speechless...to treat kids like that............thanx heimdhal and ohl....theres hope yet in the world.

MNeagle
17th January 2012, 07:28 PM
Wow. If you're not aware, check into whether or not these kids are coming from Section 8 housing. There are now a LOT of sec. 8 'rentals' in more 'burbs since houses aren't selling. So the owners transfer the house into sec. 8 rentals, and so begins the string of 'interesting' neighbors, etc. in the area. Also, some states have laws mandating the 'equal' dispertion of sec. 8 housing throughout the state/city.

Often times the only way to find out is via public tax records...

Heimdhal
17th January 2012, 07:34 PM
Oh I have no doubts MN.

The lady with 5 kids was a section 8. Were a town home community in South Florida, theyre house was very similar to ours and section 8 was paying 100% of the rent.....1,400$ a month.

Im pretty sure these new folks are, too. Its a mixed race pairing with the adults. The boy and his sister and mom are white, the dad is black with a daughter from his previous marriage (shes 18 though).

In fact, I forgot to mention, this is the same kid, who he and his friends, had never held a real shovel before until they saw me using one in my garden. They'd never seen an actual shovel in person............ a shovel.........a shovel.....

Old Herb Lady
17th January 2012, 07:37 PM
Wow. If you're not aware, check into whether or not these kids are coming from Section 8 housing. There are now a LOT of sec. 8 'rentals' in more 'burbs since houses aren't selling. So the owners transfer the house into sec. 8 rentals, and so begins the string of 'interesting' neighbors, etc. in the area. Also, some states have laws mandating the 'equal' dispertion of sec. 8 housing throughout the state/city.

Often times the only way to find out is via public tax records...


(In my story) The mothers were both the homeowners. I went & checked it all out when it first started.
The mothers have to work full-time cuz there's no baby-daddy & so the kids get babysat by idiots & the moms are run ragged & the kids fend for themselves.

My best friend has a great job & lives in one of those really ritzy neighborhoods in a different town & you would never believe that she
lets her kids pretty much fend for themselves, too. I'm always bitchin' at her & she says that her kids are smart & more independent than most.
She just got divorced after like 11 years & there's no dad there now either.
(and she always makes fun of us hillbillies for being hillbillies but at least my kids don't get left unattended !! )

(roll my eyes )

joboo
17th January 2012, 09:08 PM
Exemplary character. Solid community member.

Book
17th January 2012, 09:17 PM
http://www.areyouscreening.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/01/grantorino2.jpg

Reminds me of the Gran Torino movie.

:)

zap
17th January 2012, 09:27 PM
Great Hemi glad you had some time for a kid who needed you, it is a sad state of affairs these days, seems everyone is to busy to take care of their own kids, the family unit is broken.

You won't see my child at a sitters, gallivanting around the countryside, nope she is attached to my hip, seriously .....

I couldn't shake her if I tried.:)

StreetsOfGold
17th January 2012, 11:49 PM
Great Hemi glad you had some time for a kid who needed you, it is a sad state of affairs these days, seems everyone is to busy to take care of their own kids, the family unit is broken.

You won't see my child at a sitters, gallivanting around the countryside, nope she is attached to my hip, seriously .....

I couldn't shake her if I tried.:)


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D38S9o_6qnc

Twisted Titan
18th January 2012, 04:09 AM
Always be kind to The Wee Ones.

In the fullness of time your act may be the one faint shred of light that keeps them from being made a servant of The Dark side.

I had a math teacher Mr Fabrizio when I was in fourth grade who spent a lot time with me and my brothers ( long before the days of having to worry about teachers taking a "extra interest "in students was a crime of the first order)

we kept cool through the years and I could always rely on him to be a place to vent and hang out on i cant even count how many times I showed up no notice and he never chewed me out.

we eventually lost contact but I NEVER forgot how good he was to me.

Fast forward twenty five years into the future I'm working the hospital night shift and I see Daniel Fabrizio on the work order I freeze in my tracks

I look.at The patient and don't recognize him. .......but then I remember Mr.D was a junior. That was his dad and when i spoke to the nurse I got The inside scoop he wasnt going to be here much longer

I left my contact info with The nurse and I made it abundantly clear in no uncertain terms This man is related to me and his needs are to adressed I'm calling in my favor on this one..pass the word along to the rest of the shift nurses. I WILL BE CHECKING ON HIM

The next day I saw Mr D and we hammed it up pretty good but we both realized time was short he didn't have best realtionship with his old man and now all the lost years was coming back to haunt him.

I said don't worry. The important thing is you have the power The speak on behalf of your Father now and be his advocate.God fixed it so you have the chance To keep a vigil over him as he stands in the gap of Two Worlds. not many are afforded the oppertunity to square up loved ones He can't speak now.......but just trust that he knows what do for him and to make sure you got the message he pulled someone from your past and put him in the exact place he needed to be for you to get that.


We were both in awe of the situation, circumstances and The words I was able to bring to The moment.


I helped bring a significant amount of closure for him.

The point is I was able to repay a kindess that was done for me.

The good you have done for those kids Will come back in some one way where The impact will be just as big on you as it was to them all those years ago.

You will remember I spoke on this.

LastResort
18th January 2012, 04:35 AM
Makes me really appreciate the parents I have when I hear stories like this.

Thanks for sharing Heimdhal.

osoab
18th January 2012, 05:03 AM
I don't care what they say about you Heimdhal, your alright in my book. ;D

Silver Rocket Bitches!
18th January 2012, 07:02 AM
We need more like you. Leadership in the presence of youth is paramount.

k-os
18th January 2012, 07:45 PM
This whole thread made me sad, and StreetsofGold's video made me cry. Everyone's dealing with stuff, and some are dealing with more stuff than others.

Always be kind to the innocent, whether it comes back to you or not.

zap
18th January 2012, 07:48 PM
I agree K, you say the innocent, (yes) I say the young and very old. :) don't be sad there are lots of good people out there giving folks a helping hand !