Had an asian massage today

[Kali]

Just thought I'd share...that I went to an asian massage biz today....there are several here. A couple do not have private rooms and are done on recliner type chairs and I have been to those before and the foot massage is amazing.

I went to another today that offers both the recliner which they call foot massage and a full body massage which is done in a private room.

The foot massage recliner deal is $25, the full body in private room is $45. I tried the full body.

So I go in and see the table and towel...I left my boxers on and get under the towel.

The massage therapist comes in and takes towel off and pulls my boxers down.

She then lubes my butt up and massages....holy smokes...getting an ass massage is the most amazing massage ever.

She worked my buttocks and thighs pretty good which gave me a woody although I tried my best to not get one (thought about playing baseball as a child, etc)...but she kept working it....

Made me bust a nut doing that...and she must have known as she didnt ask me to turn over after the backside was done.

Call me a perv or whatever but damn that was the best massage ever. I was in another realm...it was nuts literally!

Anyone experience this?

[joboo]

http://ts3.mm.bing.net/th?id=I4879774954226526&pid=1.1 (http://wtfhub.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/12/Y-U-NO-HAPPY-ENDING.jpg)

[Shami-Amourae]

I did a couple Trigger Point Therapy Massages. It didn't turn me on at all, since those kinds are somewhat painful, and release pressure/stress points. Good for reducing pain and muscle strain.

[slowbell]

Anyone experience this?

Nope, never had a massage. Sounds like a great experience though!

Closest thing to a massage I had was physical therapy. I blew an ankle out, and the gal who lead the therapy, wow! Beautiful redhead. I don't know what was happier the ankle or me, in general.

There's a reason why the nurses were women in wwII, women heal men.

[milehi]

Every now and again I'll get a deep tissue massage from a girl who cuts and splits firewood as a side gig. I'm afraid to cry uncle and can only imagine what a happy ending would feel like. I find yoga hurts less.

[Black Blade]

So no "happy ending" I see. Bummer.

[Dogman]

While stationed in Thailand back in the day, one could get any type of massage you wanted. They dam sure knew how to take any type of tension out of the body. One thing they always did after working the all of the muscle groups, was to center on the backbone, neck and shoulders. There was a way they manipulated the neck that would involve a sharp lift and twist of your head that would pop every vertebra in your neck and backbone, twist to the left and the popping would ripple down the back, and then they would repeat for the right. Once finished, you were a boneless lump of jelly, you would be so relaxed you could not move or want to, you feel your body was water with no tension and could be pored into a bottle.

And yes and there was a happy ending, every time if desired ! ;D

[muffin]

i'm not asian but i give mouse massages all the time. sometimes, there's a happy ending :) for both of us :D

[drafter]

Every now and again I'll get a deep tissue massage from a girl who cuts and splits firewood as a side gig. I'm afraid to cry uncle and can only imagine what a happy ending would feel like. I find yoga hurts less.

I've had a couple deep tissue massages that were prescribed by a DR. I felt like I'd been taken out back and beat with a baseball bat. Left me in pain for days. Helga was not kind i guess.
I just shudder everytime I hear people tell me how "relaxing" a massage is. Maybe a cute little asian girl would make those nightmares go away but I'm not too keen on taking a chance.

[madfranks]

So no "happy ending" I see. Bummer.

I think you missed this part:


Made me bust a nut doing that...and she must have known as she didnt ask me to turn over after the backside was done.

Call me a perv or whatever but damn that was the best massage ever.

[TheNocturnalEgyptian]

It's a little sad to me that as soon as people hear the word "massage" they instantly ask about happy endings. I have gotten hundreds of massages from many different therapists, and the concept of happy endings has never come up around me or anybody I know. I wish everyone could experience the good energy and terrific freedom of the body that I have felt through years of massage.

For many, there is a constant dull ache in the body. To some, it is an unquestionable constant, it is just assumed that it will be there. I am telling you that freedom from this is possible, although the body changes very slowly. There is short and long term relief. They are both cumulative - I use the "Kindling" analogy to describe this effect.


Kindling - Issues or imbalances in the body accumulate over time. If one muscle is weaker one day, others will compensate for it. If one muscle is not warmed up enough to move, others will pull harder to compensate for it. Overtime these overcompensations can build up, going all different directions. There is a lot of kindling in the pile. It only takes one spark to light the whole thing on fire. (ever heard of a friend saying, "I reached for something simple and my back went out!") Massage and bodywork can remove the sticks from the kindling pile one by one. Big sticks are called "projects" and cannot be removed in one session.


Bodywork is a serious profession, you might not think so because you don't realize how jacked up your body is, never practice yoga, or get massages, and you aren't currently in pain you may think that you're "fine" and you don't need this type of care, but when your back or neck finally does go out it is going to be a mystery to you why this happened. Things build up.

I am here to tell you that every spontaneous injury of the body is a teacher. (seemingly coming from nowhere, or disproportionate injury to the action, example: reach for a .5 lb. jar and your back goes out) . Your pain is a teacher and it is trying to explain to you where your body is bound up too much. Fascia is a stringy web like substance that holds the muscles together. It can easily pull and constrain muscles just as much as support them. Many individuals sadly do not practice any fascial loosening techniques, examples would include: MyoFascial-Release (Massage), Using a Foam-Roller, Yoga.



The body's issues are like kindling. A stutter-step down some stairs or a slip & fall might be something you can walk away from now, but the body freezes those issues into your muscles and this creates pulling. Eventually enough issues build up (kindling) and it only takes one spark for the entire pile to catch on fire (back goes out). However getting regular massage can remove those sticks one at a time.

I have taken some professional massage classes and my girlfriend does it full-time professionally. Asking about happy endings basically means you're ignorant, sorry =( at least if it is meant in a sexual context. I admit there are a lot of issues in the hips, pretty much every issue starts there really. I love getting my glutemus maximus massaged, too. But I think it is fair to enjoy it. You know what is sexual and what is not. You could get your hips worked on everyday for six months and only start to discover where your real pain is, start to feel the invisible pulling of the fascia (fibers that bind muscles) throughout the body.

As you start relaxing all the muscles, over time, you'll start to remember old injuries that you "walked off" years ago... Once you address them in this manner, it is usually possible to heal the issue permanently, most of the way at least. Note: you experience a lot of the pain of the old issue again as it exits your body. This is what some people call "detoxing" sometimes. It's body-mind unwinding and it is normal after massage or yoga. That is why people say these are exploratory tools, they reveal your subconscious mind to you and allow you to cut through old blockages.

Another misconception is that you "go back to the way you were before" but that is impossible. There is only forward progress. You become a new person who has integrated the issues of the old, built into something new. Your subconscious mind literally has to relearn the "new" you, the brain remaps the reach potential of every finger and toe after a massage, for example. Brain growth. Personality growth. Body growth

JMHO

[TheNocturnalEgyptian]

But how do I know all this?

My big PROJECT - i.e. what am I trying to heal?:

6 years ago, while riding a mountain bike downhill, I struck a chain, strung across the path (!) at chest height. I realized I could have died if it had been higher or lower and I had some muscle loss in both biceps (arms in front of me on the handlebars) and a lot of scar tissue in my upper pectorals as well as a very, very, very sore diaphragm/ribcage for the next several months. It took a long time to heal, there was nothing I could do to speed it up (that I knew about at the time), and again, I had muscle loss. I was very bummed as I loved to work out. My flexibility and strength were horrible at this time and I got very depressed...I also no longer enjoyed riding my bike after putting about 5,000 miles on it prior to the accident. I had other slips and falls before but none put me down like this.

So that set me on the path to learn about self-care. Back then I had experience in track, biking, cross-country running, swimming...I knew nothing about self-care.

It took a few years of constant work (I use a rowing machine, do yoga, lift weights) but I am now stronger and more flexible than I was pre-accident. I did not go back to the "way I was before" but instead I became a new person. My biceps are smaller than they were before but I am stronger than before. It is humbling and this is my fate, but I am doing great, I am sitting full-lotus in yoga, I am close to deadlifting 2x my bodyweight, weighted dips are no problem. I love how yoga teaches me about my body and easily indicates what is tight. I go into a pose and I feel a map of all the tightness and I know where I need to send the stretch. After working out very hard and strengthening my body, yoga is so very relaxing, but it is also a lot of work to do it with presence of mind and body.

And this is why massage is so great. It is like yoga's twin in terms of benefits, and somebody else does it for you. Get someone who knows anatomy really well. You'll be surprised when they rub your left shoulder and your right one stops hurting. In a lot of cases rubbing the area where the pain is, only increases inflammation. Oftentimes the knot is somewhere else and is not painful, but it's shortening up the muscle so much that pain presents elsewhere in the body. Only a learned knower of anatomy can follow these muscle trains back to their source in order to unlock the root problem, instead of massaging the area where the symptom is presenting.




After years of this program, I have been doing yoga for 3 years, rowing for 2, and weightlifting for a full year, I finally decided to get Rolfing.

Rolfing is some of the deepest massage you can get. It goes even deeper than a foam roller. Breaks up fascia.

I had 7 sessions of Rolfing so far, 3 left to go, after some of them I could not do anything strenuous for several days. It totally changed my body composition. I got direct, deep work on some old scar tissue, it caused me to detox A LOT, I will spare you the gross descriptions of what came out, suffice it to say my old injury changed after that.


It was cool to feel this huge knot in my pec (still there years after the accident) being reduced session after session.

I do not fully know why I am writing all this. But I have done so much, self-care has been a daily interest of mine for 5 years, and it is just so weird to me when people attribute it to a quick 15 min handjob. I am talking 90 min deep tissue work every month for 12 months kind of thing here. I'm talking yoga every morning. Or lymph drainage, that is a good style, prepare to detox physically on that one.

There is just so much to say I do not even know how to communicate it all.

[drafter]

Thank you for explaining what a "massage therapist" is trying to achieve. I do get soreness from yoga, but at the same time it "calms" me. Unfortunately the massages didn't have that affect on me and I pretty much begged the Dr. to just let me skip them. I'm glad they helped you in your recovery.