Importance of Scissors

[palani]

This makes sense. The doctrine of reification. The system actually believes that paper has the capability of becoming the thing. The only thing is when approached by someone with a rock don't attempt to cancel the rock with a scissors.


Homeland Security has advice for confronting mass murders: scissors

http://nation.foxnews.com/homeland-security/2013/01/31/homeland-security-has-advice-confronting-mass-murders-scissors


http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=oI5EoWBRYmo


NY POST) — WASHINGTON - Is your workplace getting shot up by a crazed gunman?

No problem — just grab a pair of scissors and fight back!

That’s some of the helpful advice in a new instructional video from the Department of Homeland Security that was posted on the agency’s Web site just a month after the massacre at Sandy Hook Elementary School in Connecticut.

“If you are caught out in the open and cannot conceal yourself or take cover, you might consider trying to overpower the shooter with whatever means are available,” says the narrator in the video, which shows an office worker pulling scissors out of a desk drawer.

[Heimdhal]

So, bonsai charging an active shooter with 4 inch scissors (and theoretically stabbing him like mad, since thats what it would take) is superior to brining an equal amount of force (having a gun) and saving lives sooner with less chance of getting shot in the face as you wield your office supplies of doom?

Why dont we quickly fashion some type of medieval artillery with paper clips and pencils and pelt him with thumbtacks and off color taunts about the sexual promiscuity of his mother? Surley we shall be triumphant!

http://www.stormthecastle.com/trebuchet/office-supply-trebuchet-images/office-supply-trebuchet-1.jpg

[palani]

Years back I had some correspondence with the FAA. Seems I had owned a Cessna with hollow axles and unfortunately one of these axles chose to snap at the most inopportune phase of landing. The plane was totaled and parted out. Ten years later the FAA was checking to see why the airworthiness cert had not been returned to them.

In talking to them it came up that they had quite a mess. Over 5,000 airworthiness certs out that they had lost track of. And they seemed convinced that these little pieces of paper were going to be responsible for large planes being flown into tall buildings. The paper, it seems, had become a substitute for the real thing.

At any rate, I convinced them I had no knowledge of the location of this small scrap of paper, that it had probably immolated itself in the crash, and was gone. I sent them $2 for a replacement document and told them to keep it as I had no further use for it. Several months later they returned the $2 in the form of a warrant and said they could not replace the doc since it had already been cancelled.

[Heimdhal]

Years back I had some correspondence with the FAA. Seems I had owned a Cessna with hollow axles and unfortunately one of these axles chose to snap at the most inopportune phase of landing. The plane was totaled and parted out. Ten years later the FAA was checking to see why the airworthiness cert had not been returned to them.

In talking to them it came up that they had quite a mess. Over 5,000 airworthiness certs out that they had lost track of. And they seemed convinced that these little pieces of paper were going to be responsible for large planes being flown into tall buildings. The paper, it seems, had become a substitute for the real thing.

At any rate, I convinced them I had no knowledge of the location of this small scrap of paper, that it had probably immolated itself in the crash, and was gone. I sent them $2 for a replacement document and told them to keep it as I had no further use for it. Several months later they returned the $2 in the form of a warrant and said they could not replace the doc since it had already been cancelled.



It seems the bureaucracy is expanding to meet the needs of the expanding bureaucracy.

[Dogman]

It seems the bureaucracy is expanding to meet the needs of the expanding bureaucracy. That would be the "National Bureaucracy" for the preservation and protection of the Federal Bureaucracy.

[Heimdhal]

That would be the "National Bureaucracy" for the preservation and protection of the Federal Bureaucracy.

Not to be confused the with the Department of Redundancy Department. ;)

[madfranks]

I never knew that scissors were so deadly a weapon! They need to be regulated off the streets and only those with permits be allowed to have them!

[palani]

I never knew that scissors were so deadly a weapon! They need to be regulated off the streets and only those with permits be allowed to have them!

Try taking one on an airplane. You might cut up a ticket or manifest and really do some damage.

[Libertytree]

Nail clippers...now that's where the real danger is! :)

[Santa]

It seems the bureaucracy is expanding to meet the needs of the expanding bureaucracy.

Heimdhal wins the coveted "Quote of the Day" Award! :)

[Heimdhal]

I can only hope Bureau Scissors, Shavers and Sheers (BSSS) can get these evil Weapons of Mass Trimming (WMTs) of our streets. I know a business in town that has dozens, if not hundreds of WMT's in little blue jars, lined up along counters, openly accessable to minors. This madness must end!

[Heimdhal]

Heimdhal wins the coveted "Quote of the Day" Award! :)


Sweet!

[mick silver]

just got some Scissors at a yard sale
almost had to get a back ground check

[Heimdhal]

just got some Scissors at a yard sale
almost had to get a back ground check

did you know that well over 100% of all scissor sales take place WITHOUT background checks! MORE MADNESS!

[osoab]

Will safety scissors work?

[Glass]

I remember seeing a skit years ago. Any time this guy, when a child, went to use the scissors, his mother used to call out, not to use the Good Scissors. He always had this worry that somewhere in the house lurked the "Evil Scissors".

[Twisted Titan]

did you know that well over 100% of all scissor sales take place WITHOUT background checks! MORE MADNESS!



In light of the Political Climate I ran out to the nearest Micheal Craft Store and Got me a pair of Tactical Scissors tricked out with 2 High Capacity Blade capable of cutting Multiple pieces of Paper in one motion.

Plus I have dual Trigger Fingers that fills in the Ports.

Im Getting The Barrel Shroud Next Week.

I will post pics then

[EE_]

http://i870.photobucket.com/albums/ab268/Blotto_photo/SCISSORING.jpg